Responsibility

We need responsibility to feel complete. I always wondered why all my friends, as soon as they were out on their own, wanted to get an animal. They are messy, they add stress, they cost money, and it just seems like an overall bad idea. But it's because we are made to have responsibilities.

I'm not talking about responsibility to yourself. Dishes, laundry, vacuuming - all responsibilities. But let's face it - those are things I need to do for ME...and they don't really bring me happiness.

I'm not talking about responsibility to your job or to your coworkers. We get PAID for that and honestly...don't usually have much of a choice.

I think God, our Provider and our caretaker, made us in His image. He made us so that we thrive on giving ourselves away...just as He has done. We need to be able to give of ourselves, not expecting anything in return, not being paid except in joy. We need to be needed.

Hence the stress we all place on relationships. True relationships require us to give AND receive.

Hence the natural progress of a marriage to children - a couple bonds over their selfless responsibility to a tiny human being.

Hence the desire for pets - a creature that we clean up after and pay to feed that can only repay our love with love in return.

And for me...hence the desire for plants. Yep, that's right. With Spring here and a great balcony I have not yet taken advantage of, I bought some plants. I'm growing some herbs from seeds. I probably won't get enough of them to be able to do anything with....and I don't care. It's something to care for. It's something living that needs me. I am constantly checking to see if they're growing, if they need water, if it's warm enough to put them outside, etc, etc. And it's brought me a tiny bit more joy :)

So there it is. Responsibility is necessary for life.

For a Season

I think I have finally reached a point in my life, I have lived enough years, gained the necessary amount of maturity, traveled through enough cycles and life stages for the truth to begin to sink in.

Some people really are in our life for only a time and a season.

No matter how influential they have been or how close they have grown to your heart, sometimes they are meant to fade away. The epiphany is that...

That's ok.

Now this epiphany will not stop me from trying to stop it. There are still some relationships I will cling to, knuckles white and teeth bared. Some I will mourn and some I will hope will be renewed. But at least maybe in the future, with this realization I will be able to look back and smile at what was, knowing it was only meant for the past. Maybe I can finally breathe a sigh of goodbye and look to a future of amazing relationships.